Growing Up

We can walk around if mommy helps us, and we can hold our own bottles now! 

(Don't mind our serious bottle faces.  When it's time to eat, we get down to business.)

One Year Ago

One year ago today, we had our very first meeting with someone from our home study agency about beginning the adoption process.  After talking with her, we walked to the mailbox together and sent off our application to bring two Ethiopian children into our family.  I took a picture of the envelope that started it all.  (Notice the Black Heritage stamp that I "happened" to get from the post office?  God is so funny...)

It's incredible to reflect on how our lives have changed since that day.  We didn't know much about the adoption process at the time.  But everything we've done since -- the paperwork, fund raising, home studies, waiting, praying for our children while they were on the other side of the world, loving them before we'd seen their faces, sharing their pictures and videos with friends and family, switching jobs, preparing our home for two babies, traveling to Africa, meeting her birth mom, grieving over a multitude of orphans, spending time with other families who have also adopted, becoming parents -- all those things have left us different people than we were on August 28, 2009.

I want to look at our children and tell them that they've changed our lives.  And that's partly true.  But really it's the Lord who has done it.  He has changed us in ways we weren't expecting and through means that we never could have foreseen.

Proverbs 16:9  The heart of a man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.

Thank you, Lord, for all the miraculous things You have done in our family.  You are great, and greatly to be praised.

Called to Adopt...First

Check out this amazing momma's post on families that are being led to adopt before having biological children.  God's Plan A is incredible... His ways are so much higher than our own!

Adoption Potluck

The kids and I went to a potluck dinner in Lexington a few nights ago with other families who have adopted through our agency, and we had a wonderful time.  I felt choked up walking into a large room filled with multi-cultural families.  It was beautiful.  I'd love it if we had this kind of event a few times a year!

We learned some things about our children's adoption stories and their orphanages.  It was helpful (and joyful!) to get to know other Christians who have welcomed Ethiopian children into their families, both babies and older kids.

I didn't get my camera out much that night, but here are a few candid shots from the evening:

Haircut

Little buddy needed a haircut... so we got out the clippers and went to it.  It was sad for mommy at first.  I hated to see all those curls go!  But I think the final result looks so cool on him.

Here are the before and after pictures.  What do you think?

Double Seater

Most of the grocery stores around us have a few carts available with two seats for kids.  The other day we found one with two seats in the front -- the kids looked so cute in it, and I loved it that I could interact with them the whole time!  They were a great help in picking out ripe produce.

They Love Each Other

Birth Parents

It's hard to describe the emotions I'm feeling.  But please read this post, then this one.  The first describes a couple meeting their young daughters in Ethiopia for the first time, but not before meeting their birth father.

This is real life stuff, and it's hard.

The second is a more recent post with hope for the birth father, who made a sacrificial choice for his girls and, Lord willing, it sounds like he may find redemption through it for himself as well.

In Your Book Were Written the Days

Our pastor Jim Hamilton had a great sermon out of Ezra 7 this past week called Change the World: Study the Bible.  The premise was based on Ezra 7:10, which says "For Ezra had set his heart to study the law of the Lord, and to do it and to teach His statutes and rules in Israel."  If you have the time to listen to it, I guarantee you'll be motivated and encouraged.  I mean, how many times have you heard a sermon out of Ezra 7?

Jim also brought out Psalm 139:16 in his sermon, which says "Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in Your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them."  Something about that verse struck me in a different way this time.  Think of it -- God had written in His book every day of my life before I'd lived one of them.  He had planned all along that Josh and I would be married, that we would have the exact jobs He has given us, that we would live where we do, that we would struggle to get pregnant, and that we would adopt our son and daughter from Africa.  Most of these things have been total surprises to me.  But God wrote them out, He formed them in advance for His glory and our good.

And He has a plan for what's to come too!  Though I have no idea how many children we'll have or where they will come from, God has determined it already.  He knows.  And so I can rest in Him without fear or concern about the future.

It's a sweet thing for me to think of God seeing my unformed substance in my mother's womb and already having formed His plans for me.  And it's sweet for me to think that He saw my son in his birth mother's womb too.  He saw my daughter in her birth mother's womb.  And He knew His plans for them.  He had written out all the days that He had formed for them already, before they'd lived one of them.

Incredible!

I Believe in Miracles

Yesterday, family and friends joined us as we completed the final step in the adoption process. Our family of four stood before an American judge, and he declared our son and daughter to have all the rights and privileges of... well, a son and daughter.  We were able to change their official names and birth dates from what had been on their Ethiopian birth certificates.  And we celebrated the amazing gift of children that the Lord has given to a barren couple.

What God has done in our lives, it's nothing short of a miracle.  Before He formed our son and daughter in their birth mothers' wombs, He had chosen them for our family.  Their birth families have long, sad stories.  But God, in His sovereignty and kindness, rescued these two newborn babies out of desperate and life threatening situations.  He sent us to a country on the other side of the planet, a continent that neither of us had ever set foot on, to bring them home.  He answered our prayers for children in a dramatic way, a way that pictures our glorious adoption into His family.  It just overwhelms me when I stop to think about it.  It's hard for me to fully comprehend the greatness of it all.  This is no ordinary thing, what He has done!

Thank you, Lord, for blessing us beyond what we could have asked for or dreamed of.  You have filled our home with joy and laughter.  These precious babies belong to You, and so we ask You to help us to raise them to love and serve You, the Lord of all life.

Pulling Up

Where There's a Will

Motivated

It's hard to believe it, but our kids just started pulling up to stand. They're only 9 and 8 1/2 months old!

God's Grace in Being Called "Dad"

We can relate to this post from Greg Lucas so well!

Father's Day: God's Great Grace in Being Called "Dad"

Not too long ago I was plundering through an old wooden chest in our house that was packed full of family memories from the past 22 years. Among the many relics of time that took me back into the past were three pieces of colored construction paper, centered with a tiny individual hand print—one for each of my sons.

Above each hand print were the words, “To my Dad: Happy Father’s Day!”

I am guessing by the size of the hand prints and the disheveled, shaky lines of writing, that this fine artwork was copyrighted sometime in the late 90’s when the boys were in preschool or just starting grade school.

Today these brothers are young men. Jacob is 17, Noah is 16, Aaron is 15 and our family is now complete with a daughter (and little sister) appropriately named Hope, who is 4.

These crumpled Father’s Day cards from yester-year would be treasures enough in and of themselves. But for this father, every Father’s Day card is a reminder of God’s amazing grace and perfect providence.

When I was younger I imagined how great it would be to become a dad. I dreamt of how I would lead my kids into great adventures and pass on lessons of life that would develop into traditions for my children and their children’s children. For me, fatherhood has always been one of the most honorable callings—one that I have always aspired to.

After Kim and I were married we discovered that God had a different plan in store for our family. We would never be able to have biological children. There would be no passing of genetic traits or physical imprints duplicated from us to our baby, born naturally to our family. We would not have a boy with my eyes, or a little girl with my wife’s hair and smile.

But sometimes, instead of blessing us with children that have our own physical traits, God chooses to create for us a family that illustrates the characteristics of His very own grace.

Not too far down in the old trunk from the three pieces of hand-printed Father’s Day cards, is an old newspaper article from 1995. It tells of a two-year-old boy that was maliciously assaulted and nearly beaten to death by his stepfather. The child’s skull was fractured and his back was broken. He had two black eyes and a broken arm. The attending physician also noted several other past broken bones and scars that had healed without medical attention.

“It was the worst case of child abuse I have ever seen.” The state prosecutor was quoted in the article.

The violently abusive stepfather also had a biological son who showed signs of severe physical abuse and trauma as well. These two half-brothers were taken from their biological family and placed into the Social Welfare system of our state.

Back inside the wooden chest, next to the old newspaper clipping was a tiny plastic hospital bracelet that reads, “Baby-boy Harr”. It was taken from the wrist of a premature baby—a patient in the hospital N.I.C.U. where my wife worked, and still works today.

Born to a young mother with a criminal history and a drug addicted father, this tiny boy was small and frail—fair and beautiful. A note was placed on his crib that he was being “abandoned” by his birth mother to Social Services. No one knew anything about this child’s medical history, and no one had a dream of what his future would hold.

Later, on the other side of the world, there would be a baby girl left wrapped in a blanket on a desolate street corner, crying for no one to hear. She would be forsaken for the simple reason that she was a girl and not a boy. This helpless and hopeless baby would spend the next year in an orphanage and the foster care system of her communist nation.

Four lives touched by extreme tragedy, abandonment and abuse by biological blood—left hopeless and alone.

But God writes our story, from the beginning to the end…and He is always the hero.

He is a mighty defender of orphans—giving hope to the hopeless and strength to the downtrodden. He places the lonely into families. He is more concerned with the life giving blood of His Son than the biological blood of men. And what some may intend for evil, God purposely and powerfully turns to His glory and our greatest good.

And with this intentional tenacity, the sovereign Lord picked up the pieces of these broken lives and formed a family—we call it the Lucas Tribe.

None of us look anything alike, but we all share the traits of our Father.

So today, by God’s incredible grace and sovereign providential plan, I celebrate Father’s Day.

Adoption Ethics

I didn't even know that CBS had run a special that questioned the ethics of Ethiopian adoptions back in February.  But I recently heard about it, and that makes me really sad.  It upsets me too.  Because their commentary took an exception and made it out to be the norm.      

This is a great blog post from a family working on their second adoption.  It's so helpful in thinking about the ethics of adoption, especially in light of Guatemala closing, Russia temporarily halting adoptions, and Ethiopia setting more guidelines to ensure that all children adopted by American families are true orphans.  It's an important read for adoptive parents who may be questioned (or even ask questions in their own minds) about how we define an orphan and how we should respond to the heartbreaking situation these little ones are in.

They're Getting Bigger!

 

And somehow our hearts just keep getting bigger to love them more and more too!

Kids Helping Kids in Ethiopia

I'm reposting this from Building the Blocks.  We met Addisyn and her momma while we were in Ethiopia, and we've loved them ever since.  I think it'll be easy to see why!  Hope you enjoy and are inspired to reach out to little ones who need our help...

Kids Helping Kids in Ethiopia

Have you ever had a time in your life when you knew you had reached a turning point? Where you knew things were going to be different- that YOU were going to be different. That is what happened to me when I was 9 years old.

My name is Addisyn and I am about to turn 15 years old. This is my moms blog but she asked me to share part of my story with you.

When I was 9 years old we adopted my sister, Aleigha, from Guatemala. My parents had asked my brothers and I how we felt about adopting a baby and we were all on board. What I didn't know though at the time was how adopting a child would change my entire family- and my entire life.

When you are 9 years old it's pretty important to you that you are like every one else. It's pretty important to you that you fit in. I remember wanting to dress like my friends, talk like my friends and do the same thing as my friends. Adopting my baby sister changed my being like everyone else. When she entered our family we no long 'looked' like everyone else. When we went out in public people stared at us or asked questions. We were no longer just an ordinary family- we were now a multi racial, adoptive family with five children (who many people considered a large family). It was sort of hard for me to pretend I was just like everyone else anymore- because God had called our family to be different.

What I didn't know then was how God would use this experience to mold me into becoming who I am today. What I didn't know was that God would use our experience to create a passion for the least of these. What I didn't know then was how glad I would be that He did.

Going against the norm isn't always an easy thing to do. Actually sometimes it's downright hard. While God has blessed me with many supportive friends- we still do things differently than a lot of other families. Different isn't bad- it's just different and most kids my age just want to fit in. I'm okay with not fitting in. I'm okay with just being who I am. I may not win any popularity contests- but at least I definitley don't struggle with trying to figure out who I am .

Because of our adoptions, I have had the opportunity to go to Guatemala and work at Eagles Nest Orphanage and also travel to Ethiopia this past March to bring home my baby sister, Havyn. I loved Ethiopia before I even set foot there and that love only doubled when I did. My favorite part of being in Ethiopia was getting to spend the day with missionaries Gary and Peggy Ifft. Gary took us to Adami Tulu Preschool in Ziway, Ethiopia and I am pretty sure I left a piece of my heart there. I have a quote hanging on my bedroom wall that reads "When you walk with God, you always reach your destination."  I had reached mine.

Being at the preschool that day also made me realize how much I had been taking for granted. I no longer wanted to just claim to be a Christian- I wanted to LIVE as a Christian. Instead of just memorizing the verses in the bible- I wanted to put them into action. I knew that I couldn't return home and go on with my life the way it had been. I couldn't open my closet door and see 12 pairs of shoes in there without thinking about those left behind with none. I couldn't go into the mall with friends and spent $15 on yet another t-shirt knowing that $15 would have fed 5 children at the preschool for a month. I couldn't just be a regular American teenage girl anymore- I was different.

And different, I am realizing, is a good thing.

Last Tuesday families in Ziway, Ethiopia lined up to sign their children up for preschool. Over 50 children came- and there were only 30 openings. Such a huge need! Each child enrolled will need a school uniform. The cost for boys is $6.20- which includes pants, shirt, a vest, their book bag and supplies. The cost for girls is $5.83 which includes a skirt, shirt, vest, their book bag and supplies. The monthly fee for a child to attend is 25 Birr ($1.84). Yes, you read that right- $1.84 A MONTH is all it cost. You and I probably spend more than that on chewing gum and yet some children are too poor to even pay that.

Soon, children all over America will go 'school shopping' with their parents. Shoes, clothes, socks, and supplies will be thrown into their carts without much thought. And one thing I can guarantee you is that it will cost you far more than $6.20.

My challenge for you is to talk to your child. Tell them. Teach them. They won't know unless you do- I didn't. Teach them something far more important than what they will learn the entire year at school. Challenge them to go without one of those items thrown into your cart and instead send that money to Lifesong for Orphans and for Adami Tulu preschool. Show them how to think of others. Help them develop a heart for giving. Show them how to think outside of their own wants. Teach them to make their lives count. Develop in them an awareness for others. Teach them how to care.

More than anything in this world I would love to sit in my desk at school this year, love for your child to sit at their desk this year, knowing across the world, in Ethiopia, another child is getting the same privilege as we are because you and I chose to care enough to do something about it.

Will you please help me? Will you please help your child help another? Even if you can just give enough for one child to have a uniform and a book bag, that is huge to that one child.

Today, you can choose to live a life that is bigger than you. Today you can reach far beyond your ordinary existence. Help educate a child. Give them a chance. Change their life.

They changed mine, now it's time for me to do the same for them.  Please feel free to post this on your blogs, facebook, or yell it from the rooftop of your child's school. ;0) Thank you so much for spreading the word.