Potty Training

I posted something on facebook yesterday when we started potty training, and a few friends asked me to share how we're going about it. I've always sought out advice from other mommies, and especially about big topics like this, so I know how helpful it is to pass along the tips I've been the grateful recipient of!

So here's the scoop on our version potty training. I know there are probably several other ways to go about it, but because I'm home with the kids and we just moved (so I don't have as many responsibilities yet), and because it fits my personality, I wanted to potty train quickly. If I had the option of being more focused and hopefully training them in a few weeks, or being more laid back and training them in 6 months, I'd usually pick the first option. Now that I'm in the middle of it, I'm tired! But I think it'll be worth it. Still, the same principles would probably work if someone was more laid back about it. I know everybody's situation, personality, and kids are different.

I used some of the advice in the potty training chapter of Toddlerwise by Gary Ezzo and I also got lots of advice from friends. At the church where we were before we moved, the moms seemed like potty training champs. One friend in particular had her daughter potty trained even overnight by the time she hit her second birthday! I'm nowhere near that (our kids are just about 2 1/2 now), but I knew I at least wanted her advice.

Before we moved, we started telling the kids that when we got to our new house they'd go pee-pee on the potty. We talked about it pretty frequently for about a month. They knew older friends that would go to the bathroom when they came over for play dates, and they were intrigued by that. My daughter had also started letting me know when she needed a diaper change, and that got my son telling me about his dirty diapers too, so I felt like that was a positive sign. I bought a potty chair for each of them, so they'd seen them and sat on them once or twice with their clothes on.

Once we moved in mid-March, I kicked it into higher gear. Every now and then, I'd let them watch me use the bathroom. We got "My Big Boy Potty" and "My Big Girl Potty" by Maxie Chambliss from the library (I highly recommend them!) and we've been reading them just about every day. I think those books were really helpful for the kids. We let them sit on their potty seats once in a while, and then after we were unpacked in our new place I set a date to start potty training. I wanted to be sure I had a couple of weeks clear on my calendar to focus on it. I do have a baby shower tonight and we're having company for dinner on Friday, but overall we've got less going on during the day so I can focus on potty training.

One week before we started, we bumped it up another notch. We kept on reading My Big Boy/Girl Potty, and we also watched "Elmo's Potty Time" at the beginning and end of the week. We watched it as a family both times, and I think daddy's involvement helped. I started letting them watch me go to the bathroom more often, and daddy let our son watch him a couple of times. Two days before the big day, we all went to Walmart and let the kids pick out big kid underwear. We'd been building them up for that so they were excited. 

We left the underwear in a prominent spot in the house so they could see them and play with them a lot in the next two days. We talked excitedly about "no more diapers!" 

The night before the big day, I let them know that tomorrow they'd be able to wear their underwear -- no more diapers! I hung up a reward chart and put their names on them. And I told them that if they went pee-pee in the potty they'd get a raisin and get to put a sticker on their new chart. My kids are REALLY food driven, so food is a great motivator for them. I left the raisins on the counter so we could talk that night a lot about going pee-pee and getting raisins.

On potty training day, my daughter woke up asking "I use potty?" I'm convinced that all the build up helped in them being kind of excited about it all and not being afraid of the potty. I had their potty chairs set up in the bathroom. I let them eat breakfast first, and then I got out their sippy cups of 1/2 apple juice and 1/2 water. They haven't had juice very often, so they felt like this was a real treat. I had one of my daughter's dolls ready, and I told them we were going to teach her doll how to use the potty. First I gave them a sip of the apple juice so they could test it and make sure it was yummy. Then we gave the doll a pretend sip. After a minute, I asked them with kind of silly urgency if her underwear were still clean and dry. Of course they were because it's not a peeing doll. So they said yes, and we rewarded the doll with a raisin (which I let the kids eat). Then in another minute I said with urgency that we should take her to the potty - we wanted her underwear to stay clean and dry. I'd put a little water in one of the kids' potty the night before, but I sat the doll on it before they could see that. I left the doll there a few seconds, then lifted her up to show the kids that she'd "used the potty." We rewarded her with two raisins (which the kids ate). We walked through wiping her, flushing, and washing her hands.

Then I told them it was their turn. I took off their overnight diapers and put them on the potty. I reminded them about all we'd been talking about, and we spent a lot of time sitting on the potty that morning. We read books, played with toys, colored, watch videos, ate snacks (all ones that would make them thirsty like ham or tortilla chips). And I gave them as much juice as they could drink. That provides more opportunity for them to pee so they'll hopefully learn to recognize the sensation. It's made for a lot of accidents and a lot of successes. The raisins have stayed in their view the whole time to provide motivation.

I did little things at first to help them like letting the water in the sink run so the sound of it might help, putting their hands in warm water, and I've also heard that using a squirt bottle on their abdomen helps to loosen those muscles. But our kids were drinking so much that those things weren't really necessary.

I've let our kids be in only a shirt and underwear all of yesterday and today. That way they can easily pull the underwear down to go on the potty, and they also really notice when they have an accident - and feel like it's uncomfortable! Even though I'm encouraging them to tell me when they need to go, I still take them every 10 minutes or so. I'm trying to notice how often they go and get them there at least that often. Right now it seems like we spend a lot of time with them sitting on the potty, though that will decrease as they continue to get it. The thing I'm trying to emphasize with them the most isn't excitement about using the potty, though that is exciting. We're trying to emphasize keeping their underwear clean and dry, so hopefully that's what they'll desire and aim for too.

Today is the second day of potty training, and my daughter hasn't had one accident today at all. She tells me when she needs to go, she doesn't mind stopping what she is doing to go, and she can hold it until she gets to the potty. She's doing great, so I haven't been taking her every few minutes anymore. As of today, my son still needs intervention to get to the potty on time. This afternoon he did stop playing twice in a row and gave me a look that I recognized, so he made it to the potty. We're getting there!

Potty training this way is a lot of work. I've tried to have easy meals ready for dinner this week.  But to me, it's worth it. Look at the results so far, just after yesterday and half of today:

Praise the Lord!

I'm sure there are some people that this method is too intense for. You could definitely take an easier route and not pump them with fluids to create more opportunity for training. Somehow or other, Lord willing, our kids will all eventually be out of diapers!